Today’s blog post is all about the handmade gifts I gave to my loved ones, as part of my love language.
Gifts as a Love Language
February is the designated month of love for all obvious purposes. Colleges across India buzz with themed days leading to February 14th, and many people in love do celebrate it with grand declarations and celebrations. No doubt commercialisation, consumerism and gimmicks define this day, and in my country it also holds negative . Yet I have a different perspective. I see it as a perfect day to express gratitude to all the loved ones who willingly choose to be in my life.
Recently, I took the popular Love Language quiz just for fun. I wanted to determine which of the five languages resonated with me most. Not surprisingly, acts of service and gifting both showed up in the top three. Both imply thoughtfulness, care and empathy at their core, and they both are small actions that help make a loved one’s life more enjoyable.
I then went on a trip down memory lane, and thought about the multiple handmade gifts I created for the ones I love. The surprise and happiness on their faces made me feel so cherished. Gifting truly is a very challenging business, especially with handmade products that are not everyone’s cup of tea. One really has to know the receiver to gift items that took hours to source, create and finish.
My Handmade Gifts
If I were to really think about it, I began gifting handmade items only in 2011. This was when I was newly married and unemployed in Abu Dhabi. I suddenly had immediate access to an amazing LYS/haberdashery. At the same time, I found Ravelry, and all those wonderful patterns and ideas just blew my mind! I finally had yarns and patterns I loved, there was just no stopping me. Obviously, my family became the topmost recipient of my handmade items at that point. I would like to share some projects I made; these memories are making me smile as I type about them 🙂
1. Crochet Shawl for Amma
My mother likes whites, and I wanted to make something for her that she could wear in India. What began as a stole, soon became a dupatta, and eventually a shawl, because I just couldn’t stop. This was a mammoth project to be honest, and I felt like a silly goose while finishing it. But when she saw it, she loved it and has used it multiple times during winters, ironically, since it is way too warm. I think she doesn’t use it any more since it is heavy for her now. But this has been one gift I have never felt completely satisfied with. It set the whole idea of handmade gifts in motion for me. If I gift, I must make it future-proof, weather-appropriate and true-to-measure. The pattern was designed by Ann Regis and I crocheted it with a 6mm hook, using Hayfield Bonus Chunky.
2. Baby Blanket for Baby S
Nothing beats the awesome news that a family member is expecting a baby. But nothing is worse than not being able to be around and be of any support to the new mother. The next best thing I could think of was to send a blanket and bibs to her, so that the baby could feel our love and affection even across the ocean! The pattern I chose was Celeste Young’s Rainbow Ripple Baby Blanket. This was one of the times when my intuition worked super hard. I had an inkling it would be a girl, so I crocheted it using Malabrigo’s Organic Cotton yarn in pink, purple and white, with a 4mm hook. It looked super cute to me, it was much appreciated and used well. She still keeps this handmade gift after 12ish years, which speaks volumes!
3. Ribbed Hat for G
People say you should never knit a sweater for your significant other, since the relationship ends before you finish it. This is the sweater curse, and many knitters and crocheters take it very very seriously. But then, what do you make for someone you truly love, especially in the first throes of the relationship? Of course I was married, but I refused to jinx anything! Therefore, a hat. A ribbed hat, no less! This one was made using Helen Rose’s pattern Cozy Ribbed Hat, with Hayfield Bonus Chunky. I think I used a 100gm skein for this one and 6mm needles. My bloke still uses it, so I know he loves it and appreciates my efforts. A successful handmade gift, if I may say.
4. Spring Air Stole for S
This gift was very specifically made for my sister-in-law. I wanted to show her my gratitude for her unwavering support during my second pregnancy and post-partum days. At that time, beyond self-care and baby-care, and with my limited supplies, all I could do was knit. I didn’t want to gift something big, nor something pointless, but something that she could use and maintain easily. The skinny scarf pattern called Spring Air Infinity Scarf by Mercury’s Cottage was absolutely the right choice. However, I made it into a regular scarf and not an infinity one. This was knitted with 5mm needles, using Lang Yarns Sol Degrade in gray ombre. I know she was not expecting anything from me, which made the surprise even better. She has used it quite a few times, and that makes me very happy!
5. Blankets for L’s kids
So, when my BFF said she was pregnant, obviously I had to make something for her baby. I had to keep in mind it had to be something light and something comfortable to use in Ahmedabad’s hot climate, yet something super easy to wash and maintain. With a baby of my own at that point, I had to have a simple pattern that I couldn’t mess up with. I chose to go with Purl Soho’s Crocheted Super Easy Baby Blanket, in white, teal, blue and pink, using a 6mm hook.
For her second baby, I chose to make a convertible bag blanket, a crochet pattern by Yarnspirations Design Studio. I used a milk yarn called Rainbow colourfuls, in a dusty matte colorway so that even if it got a little dirty it wouldn’t show. Both kids could use it as a play mat when open. When playtime ended, they could swiftly stuff their toys in, yank the drawstring to shut it and shove it under the bed.
She used both blankets till the kids overgrew them, and now she maintains them as keepsakes. I hope they become heirlooms, that both her kids can pass on for generations.
6. Party Favour Baskets
My kids went to a Waldorf Kindergarten when they were toddlers. It was one of the best times of their lives, where they were immersed in all things nature. So by default, I wanted to make handmade gifts for all the kids who attended their birthday party as party favours. I narrowed it down to Goki’s wooden animal toy and a tiny thank you note, inside a crocheted cotton basket. And what a hit that was! I still hear from my friends that the baskets are still being used as a bed in their dollhouses, while the animals are still part of their toy menagerie.
As I look at these projects, I remember the feelings that I went through while making them. There was a deep sense of gratitude, first and foremost, for all these people who were in my life. For whom I could make something, who actually appreciated what I made for them, and continue to support me and This Knitting Bee in every possible way.
Lessons Learned
Of course, I still do gift, though not as much as earlier. But I do have some strong gifting principles I adhere to now –
- I have to know the person really really really well – this goes without saying. It is very tricky otherwise, and which is why I stick to gifting family and closest friends only.
- I doubly ensure that said person enjoys handmade gifts. I want them to cherish them, appreciate the gesture and actually use them as and when it is appropriate.
- I figure out some way to see if the gift solves a purpose for them, or eliminates a problem for them. Useful items beat white elephant gifts hands down. The latter just clutter their house or pass from one home to another.
- I invest a lot of time and effort in choosing the right project for the person. More so, when there is no purpose to solve. Their body type, their fashion choices, where they live and their capacity to maintain will influence the sizing, type of knitwear, fibre weight and fibre material respectively. There is no point in gifting a silk vest to someone who prefers to not spend much time on laundry. Also, it is ridiculous to gift a thick shawl to someone who lives in a hot city (like I did to my poor mother!)
- When they receive the gift and thank me, I have to accept it gracefully. I tend to deflect their compliments and downplay my efforts and time taken. This is a personal failing, and slowly I am learning to receive their loving appreciations in a better way.
- And lastly, take better photographs before I gift them. This is to ensure that I remember the vibes through the gifting process, and also reflect upon the practicalities of that project. Did the yarn behave, were the needles appropriate, where could I improve, what could I avoid, etc. The photos I published for this blog post embarrass me at this point. I mean, I took them so casually and without thinking things through. If it were not for information I had fed on Ravelry painstakingly, I would have forgotten all those tiny details. Good documentation is a must!
Gifting is a blessing, because it means you have some one to gift to. It is an act of love, because a meaningful gift can only come from the depths of your heart. And on this last day of February, a month filled with love, I now ask you – did you give or receive any handmade gifts? I’ll see you in the comments!